The Vehicles Earth

If you read my farewell to the Honda CR-Z you will know that despite its dinky size, it majored on slinky and sleek style, foot-flat feel-good factor and bleeding-edge technology. It was missed the moment the collection man from Honda drove it down my road and out of sight. So any replacement keen to receive the same level of adoration has its work cut out.

Which might explain why there was a distinct pause on the line when road test editor Ben Pulman suggested a Mini Coupe. I love the way BMW has revived the Mini brand, the way it has keenly balanced accessibility and aspiratio,n and the manner in which it has expanded the range. But the Coupe? When I saw the first pictures of the Coupe concept ahead of its debut at the 2009 Frankfurt show I grimaced. Awkward, ungainly and frumpy. It was bound to look better in the metal, wasn’t it? No. It was what Mini people politely call challenging. And the rest of called ugly.

The production version was little different. There was none of the cute pocketability of the hatch, but no replacement aggression or athleticism, either. What was going on with that roofline and that broad flat rump? I had dinner with Gert Hildebrand, head of Mini design and the man responsible for the Coupe, on the eve of the 2009 Frankfurt show. He talked about the importance of not creating a set of models that followed the matryoshka doll school of design – touché Audi – and the need to capitalise on the Mini brand’s outright sporting intentions. Sure, but with a car that looks like Quasimodo wearing a back-to-front peak cap?

Opting for the Cooper SD version was a bit of a no-brainer. While the diesel Coupe loses out on the power front to its petrol-powered cousin (143bhp versus 184bhp) it clouts it for torque (a chunky 225lb ft at 1700rpm against 177lb ft at 1600rpm). And in everyday driving, high levels of low-rev torque is king. A 7.9 second dash to 62mph and a 134mph top speed means the Coupe will feel spectacularly quick after the Honda. And a claimed combined economy of 65.7mpg (the petrol Cooper S returns 44.1) sealed the deal for the diesel.

That was the limit of our input when it came to speccing the Coupe – the rest was left to Mini, who handed over one of the cars directly from the car’s launch. I say that here rather than after describing the Mini, for reasons that will soon become apparent. Our Coupe Cooper SD weighs in at an eyebrow-raising £20,510. That’s a lot more than some other small sporting three-door hatches such as Alfa’s Mito Quadrifoglio (£18,755), the Citroen DS3 DSport Plus (£17,895) Renaultsport’s Clio 200 Cup (£17,120) and the Vauxhall Corsa VXR (£18,900).

To that Mini has added £4,490 worth of the following options…

• Chili Pack: £1,865
• Media Pack: £1,015
• Leather Lounge (Carbon Black): £700
• Heated front seats: £215
• Sun protection glass: £160
• Chrome Line interior: £120
• Colour Line, Rooster Red: £110
• Auto-dimming rear view mirror: £105
• Alloy Wheels in Black: £80
• Run-flat tyres: £75
• Warning triangle and first aid kit: £45
• 17" Conical Spoke alloy wheels: No-cost option
• Black headlight trims: No-cost option
• Interior trim, Piano Black: No-cost option
• Interior World, Carbon Black: No-cost option
• Roof and mirror caps in black: No-cost option
• Sport front seats: No-cost option
• Black exterior sports stripes: No-cost option

I'll explain what most of that means next time, but together it brings up YK61LLZ’s on-the-road price to a not insignificant £25,000. Or £350 more than VW’s hot 168bhp Golf GTD. So is this money well spent on a red and black striped three-door diesel hatch? I have six months to find out.

By Ben Whitworth